Player, as in playa, is deemed somewhat negative in my opinion. It's not just the guy who is honest about having multiple partners, it's the guy who approaches meeting women like they are prey. There was a guy posting in sexjournals recently that sounds like a playa (and an idiot, to me). He referred to "this slut" and "that hottie" and generally spoke about women like so much meat.
Lol ok thats not how I see myself, for one I dont think any "playa" would willingly admit to being in a 6 year drought!!! LOL but I definitely try and treat all people, especially women, but everyone I meet, with more respect than that...
It came about after a discussion with a friend, she said she saw me as a player because I didnt want just a monogamous, one on one relationship, that I was keeping myself open to other options and possibilities...
Now I know thats tainted slightly by how she is wired and her view on relationships and how they should be, and thats fine I respect that and her... and I guess maybe a slightly different conotation of the word player down here as opposed to over there, less "playa" and more as in "play the field" or whatever...
Which is again not me or what I'm after, least I dont think... meaningless one night flings have never grabbed or intrigued me... always prefer some sort of link, connection, spark, bond, however you want to define it, with the people I have in my life, be it just friendships, with or without something sexual...
I guess thats the hard part though, getting that sort of thing across without sounding crass or a player, especially in a short written profile on a website...
hmmmm I dont think u are a player because u want/dont want those things... I think u are just honest and maybe it shocked her coz thats rare these days :)
I dont see a 'player' as being an honest person... I agree with u that she may have a tainted view on things.
I think u treat others with respect, a 'player' is in it for themselves..
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ninetydegrees
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on 2007-05-17 05:46 pm (UTC)http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=playa
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on 2007-05-17 06:17 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2007-05-18 12:49 am (UTC)It came about after a discussion with a friend, she said she saw me as a player because I didnt want just a monogamous, one on one relationship, that I was keeping myself open to other options and possibilities...
Now I know thats tainted slightly by how she is wired and her view on relationships and how they should be, and thats fine I respect that and her... and I guess maybe a slightly different conotation of the word player down here as opposed to over there, less "playa" and more as in "play the field" or whatever...
Which is again not me or what I'm after, least I dont think... meaningless one night flings have never grabbed or intrigued me... always prefer some sort of link, connection, spark, bond, however you want to define it, with the people I have in my life, be it just friendships, with or without something sexual...
I guess thats the hard part though, getting that sort of thing across without sounding crass or a player, especially in a short written profile on a website...
no subject
on 2007-05-18 02:08 am (UTC)I dont see a 'player' as being an honest person... I agree with u that she may have a tainted view on things.
I think u treat others with respect, a 'player' is in it for themselves..
sorry not much help am I kekeke